Losing a Dog Who Lived Your Whole Life With You: Tico's 16-Year Legacy

# Losing a Dog Who Lived Your Whole Life With You

There are dogs…

and then there are dogs that are basically your first child, your emotional support system, your adventure partner, your witness to your entire life becoming what it is.

Tico Maje Javis-Denkins was that dog.

Yes, his name was long and ridiculous and perfect.

Tico — because we were obsessed with Costa Rica. Maje — slang for "dude," because obviously he was. Javis-Denkins — because when you're young and in love you start combining last names like you're building a tiny family before you even realize you actually are.

He was our Costa Rican dude Javis-Denkins.

Our first son.

Our constant.

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He Didn't Just Live With Us—He Lived Through Us

Tico wasn't just "around."

He was there for everything.

Austin. Nashville. Miami. Atlanta (like… multiple versions of Atlanta). Van life — because of course we did that. Sharpsburg. Peachtree City.

He watched us grow up.

Like really grow up.

He was there when life was chaotic and fun and a little reckless…

and then he stayed when it got real.

He was there when my mom died.

He was there when I became a mom.

He met both of our babies like he already knew they were coming.

Like, "Yeah, I've been waiting on these little people."

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16 Years Is Not Just a Dog… That's a Lifetime

When a dog lives 16 years, you don't just lose a pet.

You lose a timeline.

You lose the version of you that existed when you first got them.

You lose the bridge between who you were and who you are now.

It's not just grief.

It's layers.

It's: - who you were at 22 - who you became at 30 - who you are now as a mom

…all wrapped up in one tiny, loyal body.

And when they go, it's like all those versions of you feel it at once.

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Talking to Kids About Death (Without Pretending It Doesn't Exist)

Here's the thing—

we don't pretend death isn't real in our house.

My kids already had a soft introduction to loss because my mom passed before they were born… but she's still here in how we talk about her.

We say her name.

We tell her stories.

We laugh about her.

She exists in our house in a very normal, very alive way.

So when Tico died… we didn't suddenly switch into some weird, quiet, "we don't talk about this" energy.

We did the opposite.

We talked about him constantly.

We cried.

We laughed.

We told stories.

And yes… we also joke.

Because humor doesn't disrespect grief—

it helps you carry it.

Now when one of the kids trips after not listening, we'll say:

"Yeah… that was Tico. Or Grandma. That was karma."

And we laugh.

Not because it's not sad…

but because love like that doesn't just disappear.

It shows up differently.

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The Hardest Part No One Warns You About

It's not just missing them.

It's the silence in the tiny moments.

The: - not hearing their nails on the floor - not stepping over them in the kitchen - not seeing them curled up in their spot

It's the absence in the ordinary.

That's what gets you.

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What I Want You to Know If You're Going Through This

If you're in this right now… or you will be one day (because you will, if you love a dog long enough):

- There is no "normal" way to grieve a dog - It's okay if it hits you harder than you expected - It's okay if it comes in waves - It's okay if you laugh in the middle of it

And it's okay to keep them alive in your home however you want.

Talk about them.

Tell their stories.

Say their name.

Let your kids see that love doesn't end just because a body does.

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Because Here's the Truth

There's only one guarantee in this life:

No one gets out alive.

So the goal isn't to avoid loss.

It's to love so deeply that when loss comes… it actually means something.

And Tico?

He meant everything.

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Forever Our First Son

Oh Tico.

Our fast, loyal, little dog.

You kept us outside.

You kept us grounded.

You kept us together in ways we probably didn't even realize at the time.

You lived through every version of us.

And now you live in every memory.

Forever our Costa Rican dude.

Forever our first son.

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